Bobbi Ann Johnson Holmes

How much is Walt like Walt?

Walt Marlow is one of the main characters in my Haunting Danielle series. Some of my readers, along with my friends who are familiar with the series, know I named the character after my father. What they might not know, the character also shares Dad’s middle name, Clint, and both the character and my father’s real name is Walter, but both went by Walt.

When readers first meet Walt Marlow in The Ghost of Marlow House (Book 1 of the Haunting Danielle series), Walt is the ghost mentioned in the title. Our main character, Danielle, discovers Walt Marlow—the house’s previous resident—still residing in the house after she inherits it. Danielle assumed the house had been vacant for decades before she moved in. But surprise, it comes with a ghost.

Did Dad inspire the character? Yes…and no.  In the beginning, when naming the character I wanted an old fashioned name. My character, Walt Marlow, was born in 1899 and died three years before Dad was born. While they weren’t of the same generation, I felt the name Walt would also work for someone born in my grandparents’ generation.

I didn’t start out to pattern the character after Dad. But when looking back, I realize that in many ways I unconsciously did just that. 

First, let’s start with how Dad isn’t like Walt Marlow. Marlow loves to read and owns an impressive library. Dad wasn’t one to sit around and read a book. Although, he did enjoy listening to Mom read aloud when they would take their long car trips across the state from Havasu to visit family.

Dad excelled in math, not reading. He preferred to be doing something outdoors, as opposed to indoor activities. He was a general contractor working primarily in commercial construction before we moved to Havasu Palms.  He was fully capable of performing the jobs of his subs—such as framing, plumbing, and electrical. He learned cabinet making as a young man from skilled craftsmen and designed our homes—along with the restaurant, new marina, and mobile home expansion at Havasu Palms. He fixed the antiquated heavy equipment at Havasu Palms, graded the dirt road into the park, and learned to fly a plane. If he couldn’t figure out how to fix something on his own, he often relied on instruction manuals, long before the days of how-to YouTube videos.

The similarities between Dad and Walt Marlow are more of a personal nature. Like Dad, Marlow deeply loves his family and close friends. He’s fiercely loyal, protective, and is prepared to help those he cares about at a moment’s notice. While Marlow, like Dad, are products of their generations and tend to hold old fashioned views about women—neither is a misogynist nor intimidated by a strong woman. 

In many ways, each of them is a feminist, but I doubt either would describe themselves that way. Both have a reverence and respect for motherhood and childbirth which they display by showing respect toward women and by being fiercely protective. 

Both are animal lovers. I remember how Dad cried for months after Fritzy, our family’s schnauzer, died. About a year later we finally convinced them it was time to get another dog. With Marlow, he’ll be able to communicate with the dogs and cats he loves—in this world or the next.

Walt Marlow often charms people, and when I think of Dad, he also had a way of charming people who met him. Dad, like my character, had a way of garnering respect. 

Yet, sometimes Walt Marlow acts a bit impulsively—which can get Danielle in trouble. Like the time he took it upon himself to pack for Danielle’s cousin, Cheryl. If you read the book, you will know what I am talking about.

Looking back, I witnessed my father behaving in a similar impulsive way. One incident stands out to me. Some teenager was racing around the mobile home park at Havasu Palms on his motorcycle. Dad, tired of telling the guy to stop racing around the park impulsively snatched the teenager’s bike keys and tossed them in the lake.

Yeah, I could see Walt Marlow doing that.

Photo: Walt Johnson

Women and Submission

It wasn’t until I joined TikTok about three years ago that I realized I had been raised in a bubble for most of my life. I had never stepped into far-right Christian spaces, where the women are taught to submit to their husbands, and girls who showed their legs and shoulders were held responsible for the actions of boys.   

My parents never taught me that boys were superior to girls. They paid for my college education—back during a time when it was affordable. Had I been one of those women who discovered the man they married was abusive, my parents would never have told me I needed to try being a better wife. Hell no, my daddy would have never stood by while someone abused one of his daughters.

Dad had been raised by his grandparents and regularly attended a fundamental Christian church as a child. As an adult, he was an agnostic who said the Bible was written by smart men trying to control people. Mom was raised Christian Science and after she married Dad, she stopped going to church, started going to doctors, and sporadically sent my sister and me to Christian Science Sunday school, where we learned about a loving God, not one who we needed to fear. 

Now back to TikTok, and why I said I was raised in a bubble. When first exploring the platform, I stumbled upon videos of people deconstructing. They were typically Mormons and Evangelical Christians. And once you’ve watched a few of those videos, the algorithm kicks in.

For a perspective on where I am coming from, I am a Boomer, yet some born the same year as me (1954) call themselves Generation Jones. I have only one sibling, a sister who I’m close to. Growing up, Mom always said Dad only wanted girls. Now that I am much older, I wonder if that is true or just something Mom said to make us feel good about ourselves. However, once I asked Dad if he ever regretted not having a son to carry on his last name. He laughed and said there are enough Johnsons out there; it wasn’t a problem.

While Dad was of the generation that believed classes like Home Economics was for girls, and Auto Shop for boys, it didn’t stop him from teaching me how to change a tire when I got my first car, nor did it keep him out of the kitchen. Dad was typically the one who cooked the main courses of our holiday meals, and while I remember him making homemade pies, I can’t remember Mom ever making one.

When I hear on TikTok how pastors in conservative churches teach the young girls about keeping their shoulders covered and hemlines lengthen, so as not to temp the boys, I remember how I spent my summers as a teenager, working in my family’s marina on Lake Havasu. I pumped gas for boats, waited on customers in our small lake-side country store, scooped minnows and waterdogs, and dumped boxes of redworms and night crawlers out to make sure they were alive before selling them to fishermen—all the while wearing a bikini. Hey, it was Havasu with summer temperatures well over a hundred, and the old store only had a swamp cooler, which meant we had to jump off the docks into the lake periodically during the day to cool off.

Despite my skimpy attire, I managed to graduate from high school without having sex, although I kissed my share of boys. Hey, I liked to kiss, and it was the sixties and seventies. My point being, I wasn’t raised to feel ashamed of my body, yet I was taught there were consequences for my actions, and since I intended to go to college, getting pregnant was not on my agenda. Marriage was also not on my immediate to-do-list. Unlike what right wing podcaster Charlie Kirk yammers on about regarding young women needing to find a husband, I didn’t go to college to find a husband. I went to get an education.  When I did decide to marry my husband, it was because he was the person I wanted to spend my life with, not just because I wanted to get married.

Growing up, during my first thirteen years, Mom was a traditional stay at home mom (SAHM). She took care of the home and helped Dad in his general contracting business. Yet, unlike how I hear SAHM described by some of the younger generations on social media, Dad didn’t treat Mom like a child. They were partners. The money he earned was theirs, and they never taught me I needed to “submit” to my husband someday.

In today’s current political climate, we are seeing the prominent platforming of far-right “MAGA” Christians. One of these is Joel Webbon, a Christian Nationalist pastor from Texas. He talks about how his wife needs to ask his permission before she can read a book. Basically, he treats her like a child.

Maybe it’s the absurdity of it all for me. I can’t imagine my mom ever asking Dad for permission in what she could read. And my husband would look at me like I had lost my mind if I asked for his permission to read a specific book.

Plus, Webbon is a young whippersnapper from this old woman’s perspective. The boy is younger than my daughter, and he presumes to be such a wise sage that he can guide the women in his life. Malarkey.

I believe—and I am serious, not just being a smart ass—that wanting to submit to your husband, or wanting your wife to submit to you is nothing more than a sexual kink wrapped up in a false interpretation of the scriptures. While I don’t kink shame—what goes on between two consenting adults is their business—when people like Webbon or that women-shouldn’t-vote-Pet-Hegseth’s-Pastor-Doug-Wilson, wants to legislature their fetishes into the mainstream I have a problem.

Now, if you want to argue I am wrong about this being a false Biblical interpretation, stop. It doesn’t really matter whose interpretation is accurate. The last time I looked, the First Amendment prohibits our government from establishing a religion. Therefore, if your reason for wanting to take away women’s right to vote is based on your interpretation of the Bible, I suggest you reread the First Amendment.

However, if you believe a penis means a person possesses more intelligence and wisdom than a person with a uterus, you are in fact an idiot. There are brilliant and capable men—just as there are brilliant and capable women. There are also incompetent and mentally deficient men and women.

So yeah, I can’t imagine telling my granddaughter that someday she needs to submit to her husband, and he is the head of the household, the one to make all the final decisions.

And you know what? I equally would not tell my grandson that someday his wife needs to submit to him, and he needs to make the final decisions.

That is equally damning to both men and women. I remember back before I was married, thinking it was not fair for men to shoulder the financial responsibility of the family alone. I never wanted to marry someone so he could take care of me. I only wanted to marry when I found a partner I could spend my life with. Fortunately, I found that.

If you treat your spouse like a child—if you allow your spouse to treat you as a child, well, that is just weird. And kind of creepy. But if you are both of legal age, it is your business. But please, stop trying to push that on the rest of the country. It’s just icky.

Why should a classroom display the Ten Commandments?

States like Louisiana, Texas, and Arkansas are passing laws to require the display of the Ten Commandments in classrooms. Not sure how all this is going to play out, considering the ongoing court challenges, as many believe this is a violation of the First Amendment.

But this blog post is not about the legality of a state requiring the posting of the Ten Commandments in public schools. What I want to know, why do they want to do this? 

Seriously, why do many government officials—primarily in red states—want to post the Ten Commandments in the schools? What do they hope to accomplish? And have they even read the Ten Commandments? 

The First Commandant says, “I am the Lord thy God, thou shalt have no other gods before me.”

That might be a little problematic; while Abrahamic religions (Judaism, Christianity, and Islam) embrace the Ten Commandments, and theoretically the same god, all religions and belief systems in our country aren’t Abrahamic. In fact, our Vice President’s wife is Hindu. In the Hindu religion they recognize other gods and goddesses. So, will an observant student assume the Vice President’s wife is a sinner?

I also find it ironic that the people quick to ban books, because they don’t want their children to read about how Billy has two moms, have no problem with a poster where one of the rules is about not committing adultery.

I wonder, when one of the young children asks their teacher what adultery means, what exactly is the teacher supposed to say? In some Christian religions they believe anyone who is divorced and remarries is committing adultery. So, depending on how someone explains this rule to little Suzie, whose parents happen to be divorced and remarried to new spouses, she might go home thinking Mommy and Daddy are adulterers.

What will the teacher tell his or student who asks, what does it mean to covet your neighbor’s wife?

And what about the rule telling us to keep the Lord’s Day holy? Does that just mean going to church, or not watching football on Sunday, too? For the kids who don’t go to church, will they go home believing they are sinners? Is that what the people who are pushing this idea of posting the Ten Commandments want? Do they want to guilt a generation of children into begging their parents to attend church?  Sounds a little like indoctrination to me.

Some of the other rules aren’t so problematic, such as telling us not to lie, kill, steal, and honoring our parents. 

But I must admit, I’m anxious to see how high school students respond to the posting of the Ten Commandments, especially if they are anything like I was in high school. When I was an upperclassman in high school, I looked forward to the annual term paper, unlike many of my classmates. Of course, this meant I wanted an interesting topic. And now with the Internet—something I didn’t have for research when I was a high school student—how fun to write a term paper where I document which of the commandments high profile politicians broke. I argue our current president has broken at least nine.

So, what is the point of posting the Ten Commandments at schools?

Is it to bully and intimidate children whose families don’t worship in the same way these Christians do?

Is it to inspire better behavior from students? Yet, I am not sure how. If anything, it will list rules they can easily see people of power break daily and publicly, so what exactly does that teach them? That rules are not for everyone? That rules are to be broken? What?

I personally believe the only way we teach our children how to behave is by setting an example.

Growing up, my parents taught by example. They displayed empathy, worked hard, treated people generously, and showed us love. I didn’t steal from stores because I was afraid that I would get caught and Dad would whip my butt with a belt; I didn’t steal because I never wanted my parents to be disappointed in me, plus they instilled in me that it was simply wrong.   

My parents taught by example, not by physical abuse, and not by posting a list of rules on the wall of our home. And if they did post rules, they wouldn’t be breaking them.

If we want to reduce violent crimes in this country and raise students to treat their classmates and teachers kindly, we need to teach empathy, not post religious doctrine on school walls, listing rules that many of those in power routinely break.

So yeah, to me it’s unclear as to the motive behind wanting to post the Ten Commandments in schools.