How we feel about sex may determine the course of our country.  

In our current world of chaos and political trauma, is anyone else sick of certain groups trying to tell us how to live our lives? 

Hey, I’m all for laws that prevent me from infringing on someone else’s rights or property.  I’m all for laws that protect our planet, for the collective good. The laws I am talking about are more intimate and personal, like who we can marry or if we can get cancer treatment or not because we have a working uterus. 

We have some states wanting to ban spicy romance books. I’m seventy, been married for over 48 years; I am a mom and grandma. When I was younger, I read my share of spicy books. Hell, I have written a few in my lifetime. You don’t like them? Then don’t read them.

In Texas they can regulate how many sex toys an adult can own. Seriously people, you spent taxpayer dollars regulating how many sex toys an adult can own?  However, Texas has no laws regulating how many guns a person can own. Funny thing, I never remember hearing about a dildo shooting up a classroom of kids.

There are also folks talking about making birth control illegal. It is no one’s freaking business if an adult chooses to use birth control. I think some elected officials forget they were voted into office to work for us, not to regulate our sex lives.

It’s not always a lawmaker attempting to assert control over people when they don’t agree with someone’s life choices. Such as the person who insists on calling a trans person by their dead name. Those who defend this practice often say something like, “their birth name is their real name.” That is utter BS. They are just being intentionally mean and rude. 

Non-trans people have been changing their names forever. As a little girl I was called Bobbi Ann, and then later dropped the Ann. My husband’s real name is Donald, and as a child he went by Donnie, and today he goes by Don.  Non-trans people often go by nicknames or legally change their birthname for one reason or another.

It’s not just the overstepping legislators or those who go out of their way to ruin someone’s day. We have the Heritage Foundation working behind the scenes in an attempt to force us all to live their version of Christian Stepford Wife Utopia, where we all attend the same type of church, and the women marry, have lots of children and obey their husbands.

Here’s the thing, it’s my opinion—prove me wrong—the Heritage Foundation’s (and similar groups) views on how to live is nothing more than a sexual kink. Hey, I am not one to kink shame. If two consenting adults want to role play dominate and submissive games, that is their prerogative, but the entire country is not interested in joining you—I can practically guarantee that.

If an adult woman wants to talk in a keep-sweet voice, always look pretty for her man, and is willing to be on sexual call 24/7, while taking no birth control, with no anticipation her own sexual needs will be met, that is her business.  

That is certainly something I would have never signed up for. My mama taught me sex is a perfectly natural and beautiful act between two people who love each other, and if not mutually enjoyed, he is not doing it right.  Mom never said that last part, I just added it. But I don’t believe a man who loves his woman would ever—and I mean ever—expect her to have sex with him unless he intends to do his damnedest to satisfy her.

I suspect that’s one reason some of those states are trying to ban spicy books. They  want women to see sex as a spousal duty, for the sole pleasure of her husband. A wife  is supposed to submit her body, allow her husband to do whatever he wants, and don’t expect anything in return.  If that is your kink, fine. Just don’t impose it on unwilling adults.

Their vision is a world where a woman is nothing but an object for a man’s use and for breeding without any real consideration for her needs. When having sex, it is about his pleasure, not hers. When breeding, there is no consideration for her health. In their world, she can be denied vital lifesaving medication—even if not pregnant—for fear it may interfere with a future pregnancy. She is to cook and clean and take care of the home and children. She could easily be replaced by a robot, if only they could figure out a way for a robot to incubate human babies.

We are each given one life to live during this time on earth. How we choose to live that life is our choice.  If you believe in the Bible, then you believe we are each given free will—free will to live our lives as we want. If we go to hell for our choices, then that’s our business, not yours.

This would be a better country if people would respect the choices of other Americans.  Well, maybe not respect them, but at least mind your own business if it is not hurting you. For example, if you hate nose rings and you see a pretty girl wearing one in the grocery store, keep your opinions to yourself. She didn’t ask for it, and she isn’t wearing the nose ring for you.

If you are sitting at the park and a stranger is sitting next to you talking on the phone in Spanish, don’t say something jerky like, “Speak English, this is America.”  It is his freaking phone call, he is not talking to you, mind your own business.

If you see two guys walking down the street holding hands, don’t make some derogatory remark about how gays are shoving their lifestyle in your face. They are simply living their lives, just like the heterosexual couple you passed earlier, who were also holding hands, but with them you flashed a smile. 

If someone else’s life choices don’t hurt you or others (which doesn’t include making you uncomfortable), then be a decent person, maybe even try a little empathy.  Let people live their lives and be happy. If Jimmy across the street feels more at home wearing dresses, so what? It’s just clothes. Have you seen how the founders of our country dressed? Tights, lace shirts, and wigs. 

Okay, that’s my rant for today.  But before I go, in case this is the first time you’ve come across my blog, but you’ve heard about my Haunting Danielle paranormal cozy mystery series, I should probably warn you, it isn’t a spicy romance. It’s G-rated, and my characters keep their bedroom doors shut. 

But, if you do enjoy a spicier read, you can check out the books written under my Anna J. McIntyre pen name. The Coulson Family Saga is a five book series spanning a century. It’s available in audiobook format—and the narrator did a marvelous job. Actually, I have terrific narrators for both the Coulson Family Saga and Haunting Danielle.

There are also four happily ever after romances under the McIntyre pen name.

How spicy are my McIntyre books? I suspect not as spicy as some of the romance books I’ve seen promoted over on Booktok.

One way to reduce crime and violence, yet Moms for Liberty & MAGA aren’t on board. In fact, they’re against it.

Do you know what violent criminals have in common? A lack of empathy.

There have been studies that show empathetic people are less likely to engage in crime. Empathetic teenagers are less likely to be delinquents.

Just look at drug lords. You think drug lords and the people who work for them are empathetic? An empathetic person would be far less likely to brutally kill innocent people who got in their way.

According to various studies, empathy can be taught.  As a parent, if you want your children to grow up to be upstanding citizens—who don’t commit crimes—then teaching them empathy would probably benefit them more than going to church. Unless, of course, your church teaches empathy.

However, there are some self-professed Christians on the right who teach “The sin of empathy.”  Personally, I find that a twisted interpretation of Jesus’s teachings. But men have been twisting the word of God for centuries, for their own agenda, so I can’t be surprised.

We can debate if it’s a sin or not, but the proof is in the pudding, as they say.  People who lack empathy are more likely to commit crime.

According to one study, “The literature affirms that the low level of empathy, guilt, embarrassment, and moral reasoning displayed by violent and psychopathic criminals is strongly associated with empathy-linked brain regions that are smaller in size or less developed.”

Moms for Liberty, the infamous book banners also have an issue with teaching empathy in our schools. In fact, many books they specifically target are those that teach empathy.

It seems the MAGA trend these days is to get rid of anything remotely woke, and empathy definitely falls within the realm of woke. While MAGA proudly boasts about “woke free zones” they assume the only damage will be to marginalized groups, and since they lack empathy, they don’t care. However, they should.

Why?

Because someone they love may suffer the fallout. Take, for example, gun violence in our country. Shootings in our schools, mass shootings in our communities. They happen every week. Sometimes more frequently. We’re told the answer isn’t gun control. Some suggest we need to up our mental health in this country, but that ain’t gonna happen. Our health care in the US is dismal and the president is already talking about getting rid of ACA and cutting Medicaid, and possibly Medicare.

While it would not prevent all shootings, teaching empathy instead of forbidding it could help significantly. If you don’t believe me, look up some of the studies. Google is free.

But instead of teaching empathy, organizations like Moms for Liberty act like teaching empathy to young children in schools is no different than handing out copies of Hustler Magazine to third graders.

One woman from Moms for Liberty stated, “Not every human is deserving of my child’s empathy.”

Here is the problem with that. That human she mentioned may be a troubled and severely odd youngster in her child’s school. If the students in the school fail to show empathy toward the troubled child—some even tormenting and teasing him or her—well that’s one way to birth a school shooter.

If that mother’s child is gunned down by the troubled classmate, I’m not sure what benefit her dead child gained by withholding empathy. 

While none of us are safe from violence in this country, raising up a generation without empathy will certainly make it worse.

Notable Quotes on Empathy

Plato: “The highest form of knowledge is empathy, for it requires us to suspend our egos and live in another’s world.”

Rabbi Jonathan Sacks: ” Empathy is not a lightweight, touchy-feely, add-on extra to the moral life. It is an essential element in conflict resolution. 

Thomas Nelson Bibles: “Empathy is more than an attractive personality trait. It’s an instrument of healing. Jesus understood that better than anyone.”

The True Persecutor of Christians in the USA

After I heard of Trump’s executive order aimed at eradicating “anti-Christian bias” in the federal government, I read some articles to help understand what he planned.

According to various online newspaper articles, it would involve agencies reviewing practices that try to suppress religious activities and activisms.

I then wondered, does Trump realize he is pushing a new federal policy that he in essence violated not three weeks ago?

Remember that prayer meeting with Pastor Budde where she is invited to speak at a prayer meeting? You know a prayer meeting, where people talk about their faith and religious beliefs, and they pray. They pray in the way their faith has taught them.

But after Pastor Budde basically parroted Jesus’s word (You know Jesus, the one they call Christ, the one the Christian faith is supposedly based on) Trump got all up in his feels, claimed she was out of line, not very good at her job, and attacked her online.

When someone has millions of followers on social media, and they accuse someone of committing some egregious wrong against them—as Trump did Budde—there is always a risk that some of those followers will then attack the person whom they believed wronged their hero. 

And sure enough, Pastor Budde received death threats from Trump supporters simply because she was expressing her Christian beliefs. Is Trump’s administration planning on going after those people?

Remember how we’ve been told all of our lives that many of the Christians who first came to America did so to escape religious persecution? It’s one reason we have the First Amendment, to protect American citizens from being persecuted by the government because of their religion.

You want to guess what folks were most likely to be persecuting Christians back then—those Christians who fled to this new land seeking religious freedom? Other Christians!

Quakers, Separatists, Puritans, and Catholics are all Christian, and all came to this country to avoid persecution from other Christians. Across the pond, before and after we were a country, Protestant and Catholic differences often led to bloody outcomes.

There are over 200 Christian denominations in this country. I fear Trump’s new anti-Christian bias agenda is attempting to define what it is to be Christian, and in doing so, will exclude many Christian denominations from his club. If this isn’t a clear violation of our First Amendment, I don’t know what is.

Let’s pretend for a minute that America really is a Christian nation, with no atheists, agnostics, Muslims, Jews, Hindus, Buddhists, Sikhs, Daoist, Bahai’s, Wicca, or any other religion.  Christians would still be persecuted in this country, by other Christians. Trump’s new anti-bias Christian agenda would be targeting people that aren’t “their kind of Christians,” just as it is now.

One thing about Christians, they LOVE to tell other people they are not real Christians because they don’t believe how they do.

Guess what, there are Christian religions out there that support LGBTQ communities and same sex marriage, along with abortion rights. There are Christians out there who, like Jesus, welcome the immigrant and believe in feeding the poor and helping the downtrodden. 

Right now, I can practically hear some “Christians” proclaiming those religions I just mentioned are not real Christians. Which only proves my point. 

Evangelicals often love to tell other Christians, like Catholics, Mormons, Christian Scientists, Jehovah Witnesses, and Unitarians that they are not “real” Christians.  

So Trump’s new agenda, in my opinion, is not about protecting the Christian faith, it is about redefining what Christianity is, and then prioritizing their beliefs, while persecuting the “Other Christians,” many of whom are actually practicing Jesus’s teachings.

There are politicians in this country who love to shout about a war on Christians. In my opinion, the call is coming from within the house.  Why? Because there is a loud group of Christians who, instead of spreading the word of Jesus, divide this country by spreading hate instead of love. A group that has turned empathy—one of Jesus’s most notable traits—into a sin. The number of adults identifying as Christian in this country is declining. One reason, I believe, is that they don’t want to be associated with “those” Christians.

I used to identify as Christian, but the behavior of some of the more outspoken Christians in this country has made me unwilling to be asociated with that group. It doesn’t mean I have pushed away Jesus, just the moniker Christian. And I’m not alone.

But this is nothing new. It’s my opinion Jesus’s message was hijacked for personal and political gain the moment he died on that cross. And it has been going on for centuries.

In conclusion, I strongly support our US Constitution and feel Trump’s anti-Christian policy violates the First Amendment.